Post by neilcrud on Mar 10, 2007 11:47:17 GMT
Crud 4 and The UK Subs
4Q rehearsed for the first time since before Christmas on January 7th 1988 (with our newly aquired drumkit), and we were very rusty and the reality of how much more work needed to be put into being a band struck home when our contemporaries Yr Anhrefn started a nine date tour of West Germany.
We also had a run in with Colwyn Greenpeace after Paul Puke had told them it was just a front to fund their drug habits. This was a throwback to the gig with The Sticklebacks last October which ended with tensions running high. A couple of nights earlier, Cumi, Paul and myself narrowly escaped arrest when we were caught red handed by the police defacing a ‘For Sale’ sign to ‘For Q’, Cumi was actually standing on my shoulders with a spray can in his hands when the police turned up!
Earlier in the day I had taken the templates for the new issue of Crud to the printers and I sussed something was up when the girl assistant looked at me disgusted and her boss came out and ranted,
‘There’s no way I’m touching that.’
I guess he was a little upset by the picture of Siouxsie Sioux with a penis and 4 breasts! Although it was Issue 4, it was in fact the 3rd copy of Crud. Number 3 was sent to Crud Crew member Jill The Ripper to finish, but we fell out after I spurned her advances. She denied ever receiving the templates, which was a great pity as it was a fantastic issue, complete with an Alien Sex Fiend interview and adorned with Jill’s excellent artwork. She also designed the sleeve for Anhrefn’s debut LP ‘Defaid, Skateboards a Wellies.’
Rehearsals were coming thick and fast for both 4Q and NRG. I tried to keep the bands separate in as much as rehearsing on different nights. With the heavy rock covers we did Trooper, Touch Too Much, Let There Rock, Paranoid, Whole Lotta Rosie, Live Wire, We Are The Road Crew and 4Q’s Nein Werk.
4Q rehearsals were most intense as Cumi still needed the practise. We tried out a new song called It’s Gonna Get Worse, which was a punk-reggae ditty in a Johnny Was (SLF) mode (although far crapper!). We also had a song called Septic Turd, but couldn’t get a tune sorted for it.
Septic Turd
I looked down the bog
And it gave me a fright
What the fuck did I eat last night?
Squeezed out of my ring it was really tight
Lumps of sweetcorn in my shite
Oh deary me this is absurd
I’ve done myself a septic turd
Lying in the bog, bubbling and green
I was nearly knocked out
The stench was obscene
My hole was so hot it let off steam
It took two rolls to wipe it clean
I even had to think about getting a job having left my hugely successful and prospective career as an arcade attendant! The dole money was diabolical, the council wanted £273 in rates off me, the rent was £25 a week, and I had a band to fund and a strong lager habit to feed! I had an interview a a Bingo Caller (on the blue it’s 4 and Q!) and also as a shelf stacker in B&Q Llandudno. On the way back from the interview I began a huge flyposting campaign for the forthcoming UK Subs gig.
We had a gig to do at the Village Inn, Llanfairfechan on 24.01.88, using the name THE 4 QUAVERS to avoid detection, but when support band Subway (from Colwyn Bay) mistakenly told the pub it was 4Q, the gig was pulled.
Paul and myself did have a gig four days later with NRG at The Bee in Rhyl with support coming from Subway. Razorwire fanzine wrote:
Mr Crud was in typical jovial mood after the show,
'Subway were awful, but not as bad as the landlord who’s a complete tosspot. NRG played really well but only to about 15 people, that’s the problem with Rhyl, it’s full of apathetic wankers; the people who are into live music all stick together and only play and watch the bands in their ‘collective.’ Anyway I hope never play for NRG again as I find it utterly boring.'
It was my last foray into heavy rock, and NRG only played two more gigs post-Crud.
I had been busy arranging gigs through the new year and the schedule was building up, and I had also found a printer willing to handle Crud, no questions asked for £62 (he also printed the tickets for the forthcoming UK Subs show) and Crud 4 was unleashed on 29 January 1988. It had been a year since the fanzine first emerged. Originally started by Edi and myself in October 1986, we produced a hand written prototype a month later. Edi lost interest, so Wayne took over his reins. I bought a typewriter and by the third week of Jan87 there were 200 copies of Crud #1 unleashed; 110 of which were sold in Colwyn Bay and the North West (thanks to Radio Lancs reviewing it) and the remaining 90 were sold at an Alien Sex Fiend gig in Manchester. With it selling out in under 3 weeks, it was the encouragement to continue the project and Crud #2 hit the streets at the end of Apr87, a vast improvement of the primitive original. The print run increased to 1000 copies and sold like hot cakes at 25p a copy. The zine took a backseat through the rest of the year when 4Q formed and by Crud #4 I was editing the zine on my own, and even built up enough revenue to place an advert in Sounds.
There were a couple of unexpected surprises lurking just around the corner…
Two Henchmen turned up at my front door that day; the initial reaction was to fucking shit myself, my whole life flashed before my very eyes. They were after tickets for the Subs gig and gave me £52.50 for 21 of them, which would go toward the money I’d been siphoning off for personal gain. My fears were for security, especially when there’s twenty odd Hells Angels turning up. One of the agreements for hiring the Leisure Centre was security, so quick thinking I offered the task to the ones most likely to cause it and asked if three Henchmen would ensure there was no trouble, each getting a tenner.
I then phoned Charlie Harper of the UK Subs to OK everything for the gig and he didn't have a clue what I was talking about! I sent the confirmation to Fallout Records last month and they didn't pass the news on – CHRIST! Anyway all was sorted as the Subs were playing in Retford Porterhouse the night after, so they’ll come up on Friday to do the gig and then cross country to Retford and then they’re in Holland on Sunday. FUCK ME, lucky I phoned otherwise I’d be booking a one way ticket to Brazil with 200 punks wanting money that I had already spent, or I'd be digging my own grave. Two frights in one day, I had to change my underpants before that night’s rehearsal.
We nearly didn’t get to play with the Subs as Paul was absent without leave at rehearsals the night before, showing up as we were leaving. He got a bollocking and stormed out throwing a ‘fuck off’ in his wake. With things patched on Friday 5 February and after nine weeks off stage, 4Q finally emerge from their scumholes to perform at the Leisure Centre with the legendary UK Subs. Ticket sales were 220 (not including seven forged ones, which Debbie Shields had done).
The Centre's management said they'd be watching close, not so much because of the Subs but because of 'the reputation the support band have built up.’
The UK Subs came on for a night of punk cabaret. They stayed at the House of Crud and I woke up to the smell of Charlie Harper cooking everyone porridge and pizzas for breakfast which Paul Puke had nicked from work! Their drummer Steve Roberts, kept going to the bog with a bag of white powder, which I guess wasn’t Vim to clean the bog!
It was quite an occasion for myself to have The UK Subs stay at my flat. I was all starry eyed; after all, this was a band who I had idolised as a teenager, who I had seen loads of times on Top Of The Pops, whose records I had in my collection. And here they were signing my bog wall (as did all visitors) and sleeping on my living room floor.
A successful gig? Well 4Q got a mixed reaction, mainly negative, 220 people were there and they all stood as far back as possible during the set, leaving a huge void in front of us. This was our first appearance in Colwyn Bay since the riotous debut eight months before and there was bad blood to be smelt. A lot of people resented the fact that we were in the papers every week, others thought we should've split when Edi left and resented the fact that I got into an altercation with him. And there were others who didn't like the way we had treated Budgie. Uncle Bowler staggered toward the stage and threw a glass at us shouting,
‘All I can say is fuck you!’
And he meant it.
The Subs roadie cum money man complained about what I paid them (£220), but it was all I had left. Charlie Harper told him to shut up and that the amount was fine. The hall cost £53, PA £100, Security £30 - I made a tidy sum of £126 from this gig and didn’t share it with the band, having spent it from advance ticket sales, but I felt justified in keeping the cash as it was me who did all the work behind the scenes and got little thanks for it.
NORTH WALES PIONEER 11.3.88
Armed with a pint of best bitter and the latest copy of Crud I waited for the late 70's punk movement to reoccur.
Those aged relics from the late 70's punk era, the UK Subs, provided devoted fans, both young and old, with a brilliant and professional look at the good old school of punk.
The 4 piece band were as tight as ever ringing out such fine multicoloured gems as Warhead, Tomorrow's Girls and Teenage, into their seemingly everlasting repertoire.
It was good to see those old timers still belting out the classics of a long gone and sadly missed era with such gusto despite their forwarding years and receding hair.
In front of hoards of young fresh punks, bikers and other assorted bods the support band, Colwyn Bay's very own 4Q, unleashed their own brand of noisy unmusical thrash dotted with interesting "f" lyrics,
However the concert turned out to be a great success and I hope this will pave the way for more frequent live concerts in the Leisure Centre.
Tony Winmore
On Tuesday 9 February the Headmaster of Eirias High School, Colwyn Bay announced over the tannoy that if any pupils are offered a copy of Crud they should refuse it and report the person immediately. This had a lot to do with Wayne’s then girlfriend Michelle who was collared selling them in the yard. She was told that she didn’t have a licence to sell them and she could be prosecuted for selling offensive literature!
The UK Subs show was the start of a string of gigs I arranged for the band to try and muster up some cash to pay for some studio time, I called it the ‘Is It In Or What?’ Tour as Wayne and myself reckoned that’s what Cumi’s girlfriends would say to him if he shagged them.. I had hired Phil Neale to do the PA for the Subs and went with him to the Astoria in Leeds where he was doing the sound for TV Smith, Blitzkrieg and Anhrefn. We struck up an immediate rapport and Phil offered to ferry 4Q around and offer a basic PA for a couple of months. In return we usually paid him with stolen equipment, although he wasn’t aware of their origins!
The next gig was at The Plough in St Asaph, which was almost a Denbigh High School reunion (with myself being an ex-pupil). We had a bit of hassle getting money out of people trying to get in, but an attendance of 70-80 saw Damn Yankee play their debut gig. A messy noise of totally disorganised songs, highly entertaining and very funny, particularly half way into the second song when Dean shouted out;
‘I’ve bust a fucking string!’
Dean used to be in No Answer (pic above) with fellow psychopath Skin (Christopher Clack), and built the band and songs around his simple yet catchy guitar playing with Stuart borrowed from Ultra Violence on bass, and Hadyn Davies on drums (who sadly committed suicide in 1998). Dean remembers,
'Damn Yankee, not really a good name for a band, (it was written on a pair of jeans I was wearing at the time) but we were a band that put together a few tunes and ideas that stood the test of time. It was with this band that I wrote Beirut in Rhyl and started writing Unwanted Male (both now PSST Classics).
'Damn Yankee will also be remembered for it's crazy drummer-singer Haydn Davies who was a good friend and will be sadly missed. Haydn committed suicide. Rest in Peace my friend.'
Also playing their first gig were Glan Conwy's Total Mind Fuck, who did not live up to what their name threatened, not much interest was generated in them, they did a few covers in a rockabilly style but visually they were boring, the vocalist was called Drew Pritchard (who was on a BBC gardening programme in 2006 and runs a successful restoration business in Glan Conwy) and they had a drummer called Tea Bags, their guitarist Steve Campbell would eventually form Spoilt Victoria and then Mr Grimsdale who were played on BBC Radio One.
And then the lads themselves alighted the stage. We, 4Q were drunk, so those in the know knew what sort of a night to expect from the beginning. I faced many of my old classmates for the first time since leaving school. This put Cumi at ease and gave him the encouragement to abuse the crowd without too much fear of a physical backlash, after all, like many of the places we have played in, this was bandit country.
Once the opening chords of Nein Werk were under way the crowd went wild, prompting Paul to run around his kit while playing and stand on it. After three more songs the venue was getting seriously wrecked with tables and chairs going over and bodies sprawling everywhere, but all in good humour. The banter that went on between the band and audience was hilarious. Wayne had borrowed the Ultra Violence bass amp and it was bellowing thick black smoke across the ceiling, unperturbed Wayne unplugged his lead and stuck it straight into the PA. While this was going on Paul had emerged from behind his kit to give an accapello version of the Subs’ ‘Warhead’.
Cumi had come into himself (excuse the pun!), it was like he had finished his apprenticeship and had unleashed himself at the public.
NEIL: 'If you can smell burning it's cos Cumi's farted.'
CUMI: 'I’ve got diahorrea so watch out... right everybody shut up this one's called Jerks and it's for the Queen Mum.'
NEIL: 'And anyone who's lived in Denbigh.'
CUMI: 'And that's you Neil you fucking jerk.'
NEIL: 'Oh, oh shit, sorry.'
CUMI: 'And it's for Prince Harry as well, another fucking royal parasite.'
We even got local yob, Yosser up to sing Anarchy In The UK which was a sight and sound to behold.
With the help of about twenty punters we managed to get all the equipment out through the back door and into the van within three minutes, thus enabling us to do a runner without paying £25 for the room hire, and £25 for the bar staff.
What a bunch of tight fisted bastards eh! I heard later that the landlord was going apeshit and wanting to phone the pigs, ha ha ha. Banned again! What a great gig! Cumi’s complaints about the sound were well founded, I remember looking at the PA and Phil Neale had turned everything on full, we looked at each other and laughed.